Parenting with Positive Guidance
Coyla Horon and Malywan Vang are Family Coaches in Hired’s Family Home Visiting program who have worked in the field of Early Childhood Education for over 10 years.
Passionate about advocating for young children and families, Coyla and Malywan support the families in their program by focusing on strengthening parent-child relationships through child-centered activities, parenting skills, and family well-being. Family coaches work with parents to meet family goals and help them learn how to best support their child's development. Additionally, their program also provides connections to other child-centered resources and fun family events in the community.
Continue reading below to learn about the concept of positive guidance as a tool for creating and maintaining healthy relationships between children and parents.
Malywan Vang
Hired Family Coach
Coyla Horon
Hired Family Coach
Parenting, while rewarding, comes with its fair share of challenges. From navigating tantrums to fostering cooperation, the journey of raising young children can often feel difficult. One of the resources that we use with our participants in the Family Home Visiting program is known as positive guidance, which emphasizes connection and cooperation over traditional discipline methods. Keep reading to learn about the principles of positive guidance and explore tips for implementing them in your parenting journey!
Understanding Positive Guidance
Positive guidance is a parenting approach that focuses on nurturing a child's development through empathy, respect, and positive reinforcement. Unlike traditional discipline, which often relies on punishment and coercion, the goal of positive guidance is to create healthy relationships and help children learn how to make positive choices rather than forcing them to.
Positive Language: One of the cornerstones of positive parenting is using positive language to communicate with your child. Instead of criticizing or reprimanding, shift your focus on the behavior rather than the child. For example, rather than saying "Stop making a mess!" you can say "Let's clean up together." By framing instructions in a positive light, you encourage cooperation and understanding.
Offering Choices: Empower your child by offering them choices whenever possible. This not only gives them a sense of autonomy but also teaches decision-making skills. For instance, instead of dictating what they should do, offer them options like "Would you like to wear the blue shirt or the red one today?" By involving them in the decision-making process, you promote cooperation and reduce power struggles.
Setting Clear Expectations: Establishing clear expectations is crucial for fostering cooperation in young children. Avoid using threats or bribes to manipulate behavior, and instead focus on setting clear boundaries. Use "when/then" statements to outline expectations and consequences in a respectful manner. For example, "When you finish your homework, then you can have screen time." By providing clear guidelines, you create a structured environment where children know what is expected of them.
Celebrating Wins: Acknowledge and celebrate your child's successes, no matter how small. Use "noticing statements" to praise desired behaviors and encourage positive actions. Some examples of noticing statements include:
“I noticed you worked hard to put away your markers when you were done.”
”I noticed you and your sister shared the game without arguing.”
“I noticed you put your shoes on right away when I asked you.”
Look for opportunities to provide positive reinforcement and create a supportive environment where your child feels valued and appreciated.
Parenting young children is undoubtedly challenging, but it is also incredibly rewarding. By embracing the principles of positive guidance, you can cultivate strong connections and foster cooperation in your family dynamic. Remember, every family is unique, and it's okay to seek support when needed.
Hired's Family Home Visiting program supports families with young children, empowering caregivers through an evidence-based approach. Family Coaches build relationships with families and share knowledge about child development and parenting, as well as offering support towards the well-being of the whole family.
For more information about Hired’s Family Home Visiting program, contact coyla.horon@hired.org or malywan.vang@hired.org.